The Rodeo

What gets the most out of me? Respect. Trust. Confidence. When someone expresses confidence in me, shows trust, shows respect, that is when I feel the most driven to give 110% or more.

-Dan Phillips, Glimpse into the psyche of a half-decent guy (for the ladies)

Most people will try and exceed your expectations of them. Expect them to fail, and they’ll do it spectacularly. Expect greatness, and they’ll do their best to meet it.

Unfortunately, it doesn’t work if you expect greatness for twenty minutes, and then give up. That kind of flip-flopping will more than likely provide the exact opposite response.

In the comments of Dan’s post, “Kim” wrote the following:

I learned the hard way that when I express doubt in my husband, he figures there’s no pleasing, so why bother. Showing trust and confidence does indeed work much better.

Ladies, that pretty much sums up we men. We’ll take the easiest route every time. If putting in extra effort gains us no benefit*, next time we won’t bother.

Lads, take note – even if she doesn’t seem to notice, try and put in the hard yards. If you can give your woman a reason to encourage you, hopefully she’ll start doing it more often, in response you will try even harder – and then you can start a positive feedback loop, and eventually explode with encouragement and achievement**.

Excuses of “s/he didn’t, so I won’t” don’t cut it. It’s hard work, but worth it.

RodeoClown: reinforcing positively

*Benefits can include a smile, encouraging words, lasagne, and more!
**That’s probably a good thing…

Apparently, all it takes is to order the children’s version of the new Harry Potter. Took the guy at the desk five minutes (and three times, “are you sure?”) to figure out that, yes, I do in fact want the children’s version, and not the adult* version.

RodeoClown: isn’t afraid of reading the children’s edition

*I don’t think there’s actually much of a difference between the two – maybe they took out a gratuitous sex scene for the children’s edition.

After reading this, I only have one thing to say:

If you are considering murdering your unborn child, don’t. There are thousands of would-be parents who can love the child you truly believe you cannot. If no-one else can, I will take them and love them for you.

RodeoClown: ashamed

 Update: Read Dez’s comment. It is important.

I discovered the existence of The Sarah Connor Chronicles today. It’s a fill-in-the-gaps series, set between T2 and T3, due out sometime in the next year or so.

I was a big fan of Terminator 2 after watching it when I was ten or eleven, and I later saw the original (which was OK, but not as good), and T3, which was… not completely terrible.

Why did I like the middle one so much?

Three reasons:

1 – The Mini-Gun vs Police Scene - it wasn’t until a decade later that the HUD casualty count of 0 registered with me. After hearing a big speech about how “you have to promise not to kill anybody”, I’d never really picked up on the fact that the hero makes a point of not killing anyone at all (even when being shot at). Cool.

2 – Morphing Bad-Guy – The T-1000 was a great bad-guy; he could be anyone or anything (including the floor), and he was even more unstoppable than the T-800 (Arnie). Add to this the fact that the computer-graphics morphing was pretty much unknown at the time, and it made it even more awesome.

3 – Picking Up Small Children By Their Clothes – This is the way of the future. Portable children are much easier to manage.

So, why am I excited about TSCC?

Three reasons:

1 – It looks cool - The terminator aesthetic is a style I like, so even if the show is pathetic, it still looks great.

2 – River Tam – Summer Glau is in the show, as a robot chick from the future. This is also awesome.

3 – Another show to watch – 24 is getting pretty boring now, and needs a replacement. This could fill that gap nicely.

RodeoClown: come with me if you want to live.

I’m running a workshop at work on some of the new features in Java 5. Mark, who is organising said workshops called out yesterday “Hey Ian, are you in on Tuesdays?”.

To which I looked at him, looked at myself, looked back at him and turned back to my desk.

For readers from the future: Today is Wednesday.

RodeoClown: sometimes the best response is no response at all.

The iMonk posted a great essay. Go read it.

Newsflash: The gospel is Jesus, it is not making people moral or having a great life in the here and now.

Well worth the listen.

UPDATE: You can hear a (short) sample of it here.

Lost The Plot
Newsboys

When you’re coming back again
would you bring me something from the fridge?
Heard the rumor that the end is near
but I just got comfortable here.

RodeoClown: plotting